18. Mums & Homeowners

FIRST DUOLOGUE OF THE COLLECTION! This can be split into a monologue, just choose either homeowners or mums!


BOTH: All my friends are-

1: -mums.                             2:- homeowners

1: Mums! I’m not ready to be a mum.

2: They own their own homes. Own them.

BOTH: I’m an actor.

1. I mean my mum knows everything.

2: They have bought a house.

1. Confused? Call mum.

2: They have an actual mortgage.

1. Sad? Call mum.

2. They put down a serious deposit.

1. Stressed? Call mum.

2: As in they saved a lot of money and put down a deposit.

1. Sick? Call mum.

2: I’m still waiting for the deposit back on my last, small, mold-ridden London flat.

1. I am so not ready to be giving that kind of mum advice. I can make a mean roast potato and my resting job is keeping kids entertained but seriously…

2: Ok, so they live in small towns up north and I live in London but I can barely afford my rent and have no idea when or where my next job will be. (Beat) HOMEOWNERS!

1. MUMS!

BOTH: I am so not ready for that.


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